So You Think You Can Dance - Latest Update...

Good morning to you all (actually it'll be afternoon by the time I've finished writing this). I'm chiming in here with another update on that darned dancing show, you know, the one that goes for one and a half hours and has more footage of the contestants crying then them actually dancing. Hell, go figure.

Anyway I watched both Sunday's and Monday's episodes of the show, although I'm not exactly keen on the idea of doing a blow-by-blow account of the show as I did for the opening episode. This is partly due to the fact that I don't have enough time to rewatch and rewind and fast forward my taped version of Sunday's show, and also because I didn't tape last nights. And also because I just can't be bothered. :P

So I guess I'll just have to muse on some of the things I remember about the shows...

Sunday's was the start of the Top 100 week and Natalie Bassingthththththtththththththwaighte continues to get on my nerves. I'm sorry, but this girl has had a complete charisma bypass...I'm not a Neighbours watcher, so I don't know about her acting skills, but it seems to me that she should stick to making cruddy bogan dance-pop music. (Sorry.) Anyway, the remaining contestants had a little game of chasey through an old warehouse type place before they were all sitting cross legged on the floor and being instructed by those who knew better. Primary school much?

There are four judges today though - Kellie is a guest who has been a principal in millions of musicals and adds "experience" to the panel. This is obviously intended to make up for baby-faced Matt's "lack of"...every time I look at him I just think of those kids on Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader?

The dancing begins with the wonderfully named Nacho Pop teaching the guys a difficult hip hop routine. Five poor kids are sent home before they even get a chance to perform it. A little harsh I say, but then again, those judges know best. Cue a lot of crying scenes and wet mascara and painfully awkward camera angles as the rejected contestants call their parent tearfully. Ahh, the beauty of reality television.

The ballroom dancers struggle, a heap are given "two yesses and two nos", meaning they're sent through to "Dance For Your Life", which is just a tad hyperbolic...what about "Dance So I Can Stay In The Competition Maybe For An Extra Day Or So"...?? I suppose it just doesn't have that ring to it. Anyway, about seventy odd make the grade through to the next round.

Next up it's Jason who does a passable impersonation of Mr. Tickle with his exuberant hand wiggling. I suppose that's just ballroom dancing for you. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate the considerable skill of ballroom dancers, but sometimes it just can look so silly. The B-Boys and Fly-Girls (PUT YOUR HANDS IN THE AIR!!!) who cruised through the hip hop are now not looking so hip, whilst the poor contemporary and ballet people are getting out their voodoo dolls, wondering why on earth their style was being saved until later.

Amongst all this there are dancers dropping like ninepins. Sob-story Bessi from the opening episode is given the flick amidst more tears. Macho-man David is also told he's not good enough.
Artemi, who I swear has been on another dancing show my family used to watch on the ABC, is cut. The pressure is on....

Then the contemporary kids get their revenge as guest judge Kellie teaches the group some tricky jazz choreography. Things are really getting intense now - indigenous dancer Sermsah, a favourite of mine from the auditions, is vomiting and needs a massage, Stephanie is requiring ice, and everyone seems to be crying, from the contestants to the host to the judges. Sermsah, who has lost his mother, and Bessi, who has escaped civil war, are excused for letting out a few tears. But when a girl spontaneously cries mid-conversation with Natalie Bassingthwhatever, I started to wonder if the producers were releasing onion gas onto the set. Emotion and passion are what we want to see, but perhaps not to this rather ridiculous excess.

Everybody wants a good night's sleep now (including this viewer) but then our favourite host spoils the party, by telling everyone they have to come up with a group routine by the morning, OR ELSE. This scenario produced some interesting results - Csaba's group's marionette routine looked cool but backfired spectacularly with the judges, whilst Camilla's group's number looked pathetic but the judges loved it. Clearly, I know nothing about dance. Again I found myself liking Sermsah's group's routine over the others - this was emotional dance without being prissy. On the other hand, mohawked Rhys is quickly putting his nomination forward for the title of "Prissiest Man in the World", drawing inspiration from Prince, the Rocky Horror Picture Show and Husny Thalib all at once. Rumour has it that he used to be on a preschoolers TV show. Now there's controversy WAY bigger than that whole "I'm going to the zoo with my two mums" thing on Playschool.

After more eliminations, more tears and more tantrums, it then came down at last to solo dances, the bit I was probably looking forward to most, although I seem to remember nothing more than a fast-paced montage with some dreadful song backed to it, and some attempted lusty voiceovers from....you-know-who.

And so it comes down to decision time. Sermsah is in early on, which left me pretty happy. But there were plenty of surprises. Experienced dancing-program-hopper Csaba is rejected. BJ, who was memorably given a second chance and was lauded for his ability to come back from the dead, is kicked out. Stephanie, the giraffe-like contemporary girl from Perth, is also gone...and a personal favourite, Gianne, is told there's no place for her. Better luck next year, I guess.

Ballroom partners Stephanie and Henry are put through, while the other coupling, Brendan and Jemma, only has a fifty percent success rate. Demi, the lesbian Filipino with more energy than a jack-in-the-box on Valium, is given a spot and bursts into tears while telling her deaf sister the news in Auslan. Her brother Carlo is not so lucky, but he's happy for her anyway.

Versatile bald hip-hopper JD is given a place and looms as an early favourite. The glamorously named Hilton is also sent through but his diminutive girlfriend isn't so lucky. Such is life, girl. Others to go through include strong-bodied Anthony, who is destined to be some sort of gay icon, Khaly, a hip-hopper whose face is covered with piercings, fiesty jazz dancer Camilla, blonde bimbo Kassie,"bundle of trouble" Rhiannon, Melbourne dancer Courtney who always seems to be in tears, Rhys the fairy boy, Hairspray kid Jack and Vanessa, who, if she ever gets the chance, could play the title role in "Dr. Cindy Pan, The Musical" rather well.

Also included in the group were a stack of contestants I swear have never been featured on the show at all...Marko, Kate, Graeme and Laura all appear to be a great disadvantage seeing as they've had almost no screen time. Oh well...sucks to be them, I guess.

So now the program really starts...now we get to see what the dancers are really like, whether the hip hoppers can convert to ballroom, the ballroomers to contemporary, and the contemporary guy to breakdancing. Ah, the joy of trashy television..

;) peace